ok i'm so out of mood right now.
remember i blogged about having either to go to church camp or attend my cousin's 21st?
i have chosen to go to the camp because i didn't want to disappoint anyone since it is already paid. but now it seems i'm back at square one just a good 20 minutes ago when my aunt decided to drop by and also told me that it's better if i don't miss her daughter's 21st because it is once in a lifetime. yes i know it is once in a lifetime but don't you think i feel bad too? for missing her 21st. it's like taking a walk down guilt trip road. in fact, i have been walking on it since the day my church friends announced that they've already paid for me to the church camp. why God? why do you want to do this to me? why do you want to put me in such a difficult situation? is it funny to you? is it very amusing for you to watch from up there? it's torturing me, my heart and my head. i can't possibly cut myself into half and be at two places at once can i? SIGH.
i have just googled the place that we're staying at for church camp and just 12 km away there's a train station so i guess it's not so bad? maybe i could get someone to send me to the station so i can train back home? get ready and go to the party? damn. i dunno. i hope someone is kind enough and willing to send me to the train station? but i would feel damn bad as well. SIGH.
that's it for now, i've let you into my brain. what do you think i should do?
remember i blogged about having either to go to church camp or attend my cousin's 21st?
i have chosen to go to the camp because i didn't want to disappoint anyone since it is already paid. but now it seems i'm back at square one just a good 20 minutes ago when my aunt decided to drop by and also told me that it's better if i don't miss her daughter's 21st because it is once in a lifetime. yes i know it is once in a lifetime but don't you think i feel bad too? for missing her 21st. it's like taking a walk down guilt trip road. in fact, i have been walking on it since the day my church friends announced that they've already paid for me to the church camp. why God? why do you want to do this to me? why do you want to put me in such a difficult situation? is it funny to you? is it very amusing for you to watch from up there? it's torturing me, my heart and my head. i can't possibly cut myself into half and be at two places at once can i? SIGH.
i have just googled the place that we're staying at for church camp and just 12 km away there's a train station so i guess it's not so bad? maybe i could get someone to send me to the station so i can train back home? get ready and go to the party? damn. i dunno. i hope someone is kind enough and willing to send me to the train station? but i would feel damn bad as well. SIGH.
that's it for now, i've let you into my brain. what do you think i should do?
XOXO
Sue
Sue
0 comments:
Post a Comment