Sorry...

The day that I had to leave Malaysia, was the saddest day of my life.

This is my second time leaving Malaysia, I didn't cry so bad because I guess I knew I was coming to a place with some familiarity.

I'm sorry to be self-centered to a particular person. I thought I have always been mentioning about me leaving and she knew. So I waited for her to realize that I was leaving that day, I didn't want to say anything. I didn't want her to come to the airport because I'll definitely break down, break into pieces. That's why I never reminded her, I want her to remember the date on her own.

Still, at the airport, I cried when it was time to say goodbye to my parents, I missed them with every single breath i breathe. I dunno what to say, but I really dislike goodbyes, I'm not good at it, it's like saying goodbye for the one last time and you're never gonna see them again. It breaks my heart into little pieces, shattered. At least I have said goodbye to my other friends days before I left.

I have to come back to complete my studies,for my future. I hate Sydney, I definitely would go back to Malaysia the second I get my PR and am allow to leave the country for good. Unless things changed in between like having a boyfriend or husband here, then that's a different story. But I have planned out my future career with Ruth, my beloved sister in Christ, and I want to see it being lived up!

In the meantime, I do cry every night to sleep, it's no surprise. I will just focus on completing my studies and try to earn a living here and stand on my own two feet and then go back once everything that I need to do here is done. No more looking back.

Ruth

If you're reading

I'm sorry for being self-centered for not saying goodbye

It definitely kills me inside, I did wanted to see you for the last time and exchange hugs

But it was too hard for me

I was already crying in the car on the way to the airport

Never thought I'd missed Malaysia this bad

I missed you and love you

Pray everything goes smoothly and for me to come back ASAP!

I definitely missed everyone and everything about Malaysia with every single breath

Sue